According to You
by Cokkii
Summary: Steph is tired with everyone critiquing her and lets loose with a Girl's Night. Babe, Morelli bruised but alive. Disclaimer: I own the plot. Nothing else. Not even that really. Oneshot. NaNoWriMo.


**According to You**

We planned a girl's night out. Morelli and I had a huge meltdown at the scene of another car making it's way to car heaven. The same old, same old. You're not smart enough to do your job, you can't catch a skip without everything going wrong. Yeah, preaching to the choir.

The club we decided to go to holds a request hour like local radio stations do. You write down the song you want to hear and a singer come out and sings it for you. And to get over Morelli I had one in mind already.

I was getting ready, pulling my dress over my hips when my phone began to ring. Doing the bunny hop into the kitchen I answered just before the machine picked up. I should have let it. "Stephanie, this is your mother." It went down hill from there.

Mary Lou, Lula, Connie, and Sally were waiting in front of my building, heading hanging out the windows of a black stretch limo, champagne in hand. "White girl, what's with you? You have to make your own dress?" The phone call to my mother had taken up all of the time I have allotted to get ready for the evening. I pulled my make up out of my clutch and handed my mirror to Lou.

"My mother called."

A groan went up. They all knew what that meant. "Girl you best invest in caller ID or change your phone number. That woman is a witch," Sally put in his two cents.

"If Connie would send some skips my way I could afford it."

Connie poured me my own glass of bubbly, "It's not my fault people are being law abiding citizens. And if you could keep a car alive for more then 12 hours then you could afford it. Your insurance has got to be unreal."

I pulled the mascara wand away from my eye, not wanting to be blind for the half night. "It's not…"

"Your fault," they all coursed. "We know. And honey, we don't blame you. It just is so…" Lou waved the mirror in a searching gesture, "unbelievable that you, that anyone really, could possibly loose this many cars without trying."

By the time the limo pulled up to the curb in front of the club I had finished my makeup and we all had a good buzz going. Before anyone could gather themselves enough to open the door it was opened for us. Peeking out I was surprised to see a mountain holding out its trashcan lid sized hand.

"Hello, Bomber."

"Tank, what are you doing here? This is girl's night out. And I'm sorry but you are not one of the girls." I took his offered hand and made my way onto the sidewalk. When I had straightened, I noticed a number of other Merry Men waiting around for us.

"Glad you could join us, Beautiful," Lester said as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

"What are you guys doing here?"

"RangeMan does the security for this place so we get free entry and cheep drinks. Every now and them Ranger lets us loose. Hell, sometimes he even joins us."

"Is he here tonight?" I tried to act nonchalant but I don't think it worked.

"Said he might join us later." By now all of us were out of the limo and the Merry Men were herding us into the club. "I tell ya Beautiful I would not like to be the boss if it meant you have to skip a good night out. I need to party at least twice a week."

The noise from the club was comforting, surrounding you and pulling you in. It wasn't overpowering like most modern day clubs popular with the college crowd. The Merry Men had joined our group, snagging us numerous tables and pulling them all close together. Once we had all ordered our drinks I went up to the bar and requested my song. As my request was being written down a woman in a simple pair of blue jeans, a white take, grey blazer and a pinstriped fedora came over from backstage and took a look.

"You requested this last one?" she asked.

I nodded. "This is a great song. Can I sing it for you?"

I shrugged, "Sure."

"Thanks."

As she began to head backstage I called out to her. "Hey, do you mind waiting until my friend gets here. I could give you some signal or something." She nodded and I headed back to my table.

The woman had gotten up on stage not long after my fourth drink and gave me a wink before starting her first song. About half way through that tell-tale tingle went up my spine. I caught her eye and winked back. She nodded and finished up before starting my song.

_According to you_

_I'm stupid,_

_I'm useless,_

_I can't do anything right._

_According to you_

_I'm difficult,_

_hard to please,_

_forever changing my mind._

_I'm a mess in a dress,_

_can't show up on time,_

_even if it would save my life._

_According to you. According to you._

_But according to him_

_I'm beautiful,_

_incredible,_

_he can't get me out of his head._

_According to him_

_I'm funny,_

_irresistible,_

_everything he ever wanted._

_Everything is opposite,_

_I don't feel like stopping it,_

_so baby tell me what I got to lose._

_He's into me for everything I'm not,_

_according to you._

_According to you_

_I'm boring,_

_I'm moody,_

_you can't take me any place._

_According to you_

_I suck at telling jokes cause I always give it away._

_I'm the girl with the worst attention span;_

_you're the boy who puts up with it._

_According to you. According to you._

_But according to him_

_I'm beautiful,_

_incredible,_

_he can't get me out of his head._

_According to him_

_I'm funny,_

_irresistible,_

_everything he ever wanted._

_Everything is opposite,_

_I don't feel like stopping it,_

_so baby tell me what I got to lose._

_He's into me for everything I'm not,_

_according to you._

_I need to feel appreciated,_

_like I'm not hated. oh-- no--._

_Why can't you see me through his eyes?_

_It's too bad you're making me dizz-ay._

_According to me_

_you're stupid,_

_you're useless,_

_you can't do anything right._

_But according to him_

_I'm beautiful,_

_incredible,_

_he can't get me out of his head._

_According to him_

_I'm funny,_

_irresistible,_

_everything he ever wanted._

_Everything is opposite,_

_I don't feel like stopping it,_

_baby tell me what I got to lose._

_He's into me for everything I'm not,_

_according to you. [you, you]_

_According to you. [you, you]_

_According to you_

_I'm stupid,_

_I'm useless,_

_I can't do anything right._

As the song came to an end and I felt a smile creep its way onto my face. I looked around for Ranger, he was still standing just inside the door. I caught his eye and gave him a wink. In return he gave me one of his rare 200-watt smiles.

WC: 863 (not including lyrics or title or word count)


End file.
